I’m a generally happy soul. When it comes to my inner darkness my tactics generally involve shining a light on every part of it. I’ll hold it up to analysis until I’m happy that I understand where it came from and then I’ll forget about it.
With the release of my latest book this week it is plain to me that even my light romantic comedies have a dark edge to them. It’s something that’s apparent in all my books. There’s always a damaged soul, a sacrifice that isn’t quite worth the happiness. I think it gives my plots depth but its a subconscious thing. I don’t intend to write dark things, that’s just where the words take me.
This week I have also embarked on two TOP SECRET projects. To me this is immensely exciting. The rest of you probably think I’m nuts. One of them was inspired by an old friend who challenged me this week on the subject of my darkest thoughts. He said to me that it’s all well and good burning it away with sunshine and smiles but had I ever considered actually exploring it?
The concept terrified me. The thought of writing something that breaks all the boundaries of my self-repression, that challenges the things I know to be good and right and for which I strive…it doesn’t sit easy with me.
I wonder how many of us refrain from exploring our twisted underbellies for fear of being judged. Where would your mind take you if that fear was removed? How far would you push your boundaries of comfort? What dark corridors would you walk down? What deviance would you confess to if you knew that noone would judge you?
Kind of a fascinating concept don’t you think? And a dangerous one. Something once seen cannot be unseen. Once you’ve opened the Pandora’s box you can’t put everything back in it.
So will I take this journey into the night of my soul? Or will I be too afraid? IT’S A SECRET 😉